Greetings, all you patient peoples who haven’t quite given up on our blog yet! This is Menni, here with A) an apology about not posting for like two months, B) some half-baked excuses about that, and C) whatever I can think of to post—because I don’t actually have any ideas, I just feel bad about not posting in so long 😂
*ahem* Anyways, on to the apology!
I’M SORRY GUYS. I HAVEN’T POSTED SINCE JANUARY 22ND. I’M NOT A VERY SCHEDULED BLOGGER. Honestly, I’m amazed that any of you are still around to read this (unless you’re not, in which case… well, I can hardly blame you XD).
Excuses:
School. Writing. Writer’s block. Lack of ideas in general. All the usual suspects, in short! (Plus laziness and plain old forgetfulness, but let’s not talk about those 😅). Oh, and my new excuse of Keeping The Paladin (Who’s Supposed To Be Eighteen But Acts Like He’s Four) From Getting Himself Killed. (I’m part of an online D&D group that’s not very official or rule-oriented, but SO much fun. The problem is that both my characters are really smart and kind, making them very high-maintenance to play—especially when a certain member of the party *ahem* seems very determined to get themselves killed.)
Hmmm, I really do use parentheses too often, don’t I? (Oh well.)
On to The Post-Like Thing!
Ummmm… umm umm umm… ooh! I have a parody that will make absolutely no sense to anybody (but when do they ever?) because it refers to a letter game that Enni and I have been playing—for two years now, as we recently realized (which is what sparked the parody).
First I’ll give some explanation of the game itself. It doesn’t have an official name that I’ve ever heard of, but we technically didn’t make it up. The gist is that two (or more) people—usually writers—come up with two or more characters (who need to exchange letters for some reason); then they simply exchange letters in character for as long as they want. Basically the only rule is that the authors aren’t allowed to discuss the plot with each other.
Enni and I started the game because of a Crazy Conversation about what the worst possible thing to name twins would be. Which spiraled into the worst things to name triplets.
(In case you wanted to know how crazy I am, I just spent like 20 minutes scrolling back through old Hangouts messages to find the original conversation. So I might as well put it here!)
From March 1st, 2020, spiraling off of a discussion of what you SHOULD name your children:
Me: What would be the worst thing to name all-boy triplets?
Enni: uhh
Me: Imagine if you named them Chris, Topher, and Christopher…
Enni: that just made me laugh out loud XD
Me: XD
Enni: Andrew, Andy, Drew
Me: XD
Enni: it’s rough for anyone who wants to nickname Andrew…
Me: XD again
Me: You know, that might make a fun story… a family who only has triplets and due to lack of imagination, names them all like that…
Me: And of course they’d be identical triplets…
Enni: that would be fun…
Me: Imagine the pranks they could pull!
Enni: that would be awesome
Me: Suppose we write that as a letter thing? You know, where two people write letters to each other in character, and they can’t reveal their idea of the plot to the other person…
Me: One of us could be from the house of crazy triplets, and one could be… ummm…
Me: Where would the other person be from?
Me: Would they be from a family of all twins?
Enni: ooh I like that
Enni: then the other person can be from the house of crazy quadruplets
Me: Wait — Suppose their family has a single set of octuplets who they named Una, Dos, Tria, Quatro, Penta, Hepta, Ciete, and Octa?
Enni: gracious
Me: Two boys, Dos and Quatro. The rest are girls
Me: I could be that person…
Enni: I can be from the triplets
Me: How many kids does the triplet family have?
Enni: hmm
Me: Anna, Lisa, Annalise
Enni: how about three sets
Me: Okay… Chris, Topher, Christopher
Enni: Andy, Drew, Andrew
Me: Yup! You good with that?
Enni: yup!
Enni: I remember a story I read in Anne of Green Gables where the family was really uncreative
Enni: So the first baby they had was named Baby cause they couldn’t come up with anything
Enni: But then they had another child
Enni: So the first baby was Big Baby and the second baby was Little Baby
Me: XD Who are you going to be? I’ll be Ciete. (Pronounce see-et-ae)
Enni: I’ll be Annalise
Enni: Ciete could actually be a pretty cool name…
Me: Let’s make it modern and write emails… that’ll make our lives easier
Me: I know, that’s why I chose her XD
Enni: heh
Enni: I can’t email right now but that would be really fun…
Me: Why not? Or wait, we could write real letters and just give them to each other on Sunday! So we’d each just be writing one letter every two weeks…
Enni: ooh
Enni: that’s a good idea!
Enni: so what exactly will we be writing in our letters?
Genni: Billy, Bob, and Joe
Genni: One, Two, and Three…
Genni: Umm… I think I missed something….XD
Anyways, it only got crazier from there 😂
We might be almost done with the story now, and if that does turn out to be the case we’ll probably explain further and post more stuff about it—potentially even posting the whole thing as a kind of epistolary novel—but it’s hard to be sure about anything when we’re involved XD
On to the parody that I promised you at the beginning of this long digression! As I mentioned, we’ve been writing letters back and forth for TWO YEARS, which we just realized and which came as kind of a shock. While reminiscing, I wrote this parody of Don’t Blink by Kenny Chesney… (It’s now our theme song.)
Don’t Blink (as posted on our fact-page Google Doc titled CrazyFamiliesTripletsAndOctuplets)
I went out and checked my mail
Saw a letter from my good friend,
Number 16 in our exchange
Thinkin’ bout where we began
Looking back at this old doc
Got a shock, all I can say is
Don’t blink, just like that you start writin’ letters
And it’s all normal
And you wake up and there’s time travel
(And romance because I’m completely hopeless)
Don’t blink, you just might miss
Some plot points flying by so fast
I say “flying” ‘cause they’re ducks
Next thing you know it’s all gone mad
In just two years we’ve lost all sight
Of the crazy families we were gonna write
Trust me, friend, we’ve never been
Even a bit normal, so don’t blink
I was writing page after page, when I looked
Hard at the envelope and said
“Is this even gonna fit???”
‘Cause when our plot runs out of sense
We can’t just go back and start again
No, the EUD can’t be ignored
Don’t blink, ’cause just like that you’re just as young
As your character
Then you realize that you’ve out-aged them
‘Cause you’re 17 and they’re still 15
Don’t blink, you just might miss
A lot of ducks and crazy kids
Turning into ducks as well
Next thing you know your pen pal is
A Nazi duck (I’m not kidding)
And you’re kinda glad that you weren’t there
Trust me, friend, our letter game
Has been goin’ longer than you think, so don’t blink
So I’ve been trying to write back fast
I’ve been trying to move the plot
Although I don’t wanna lose this crazy world we’re living in
So don’t blink, ’cause just like that the weirdest thing
Is my octuplets
And your three-triplet family
And then I introduce time-travel
Don’t blink, you just might miss
Whatever happened to Conrade’s horse
Who I made so sure he brought
Next thing I know, it disappeared
And now I don’t know where he went
All I know is he went to Boston
Trust me, friend, all those plot points
Vanish faster than you think, so don’t blink
No, don’t blink
Don’t blink
It’s been longer than you think
So don’t blink
Now that you’ve been thoroughly confused, my mission has been accomplished, and I can end this post XD
Hope you enjoyed!
Yes, We Are Insane 